Dear Diane
You are my friend, and I love you, but there's quite a few things that you do that just drive me up the ever-loving -wall-.
1. Listen to me when I talk. That means no interrupting, no talking around me, over me, or raising your voice as you PLOW ON through what you're saying when I try to take my turn in the conversation. That drives me nuts!
2. Believe it or not, *Gasp* I do know some stuff about stuff. Granted, you are a very very intelligent woman, and believe it or not, I -do- learn from you, but do NOT treat me as if my mind is an empty wasteland filled with useless information. I may not be the brightest bulb in the chandalier, but at least I can shine a little bit of light.
3. Which leads us to this. Please please do not talk to me as if I am a brain dead idiot in front of other horse people. I'm fat, which leads a -majority- of people in this society to come to the belief that fat people are stupid. That is not my opinion, it is fact. It is how I have been treated all of my life. I've seen it portrayed as such even on t.v., the fat one is stupid, the thin one is smart/tolerant/sometimes short tempered with said fat one. I don't need you enforcing such a -stupid- stereotype with me in front of strangers.
4. I know you do think I'm stupid, and for that, I'm sorry. I don't speak well, I mutter when I can't get the right words out and this bloody social problem of mine isn't going to get better, so therefore, I type out what I feel a heck of a lot better than I will ever speak them. I can't stutter and ramble and bumble my words in type.
5. Listen. To. Me. I appriciate that you've got your eyes open for a saddle for me. I appriciate that you're looking out for me, but why in the world did you think that I was interested in an English saddle? When you told me that you had found a saddle that was for sale, that was almost just like yours, I immediately assumed that you were talking about a western saddle, since I told you that I was interested in one. I find out on the phone with you today that it was an english, to which I quickly told you that I wasn't interested in. I already have a nice english saddle, and it's probably been ridden in less then ten times.
6. You're not my mother. I, again, appriciate that you watch out for me and look out for me, but when we get to the mother/daughter relationship, you're not going to like opening that door. You are my friend, and moreso, a sister in Christ.
7. Thank you for going to town with me when I need someone to go with. I appriciate that you will jump in the truck with me to go to the dump/town, and I have no problem whatsoever running errands for you too. It really makes me feel safe knowing that I have someone with me when I'm driving, and I am thankful that you don't mind going with me. That means more to me than you will even know, and I am glad that you can go with me.
8. It really hurt my feelings when you dumped me to go to the bowling green ranch show with traci, after I had brought it up to you not once, but twice, about us going. Then, you went on and on about the show, and about getting to ride your horse in there and whatnot, knowing that I wanted to go and couldn't. The suggestion of, "You should follow us!" should be addressed in point 7. I am not going to follow you up. What hurts is, you know that I like to go to ranch shows, yet you tell me, "I'd invite you to go with, but I'm not driving." Have you talked to traci and told her that I would love to go? You KNOW if the situation was reversed, I'd have you with us in a heartbeat. All you're thinking of is that you're getting your horse taken up to the show, and probably about how I would embarass you or something. It really hurts, and you've done this so many times, that I have shut the door on ranch shows. I will never go to one with you or traci, nor will I compete.
9. I just wonder if you talk bad about me like you tend to talk about traci. And what I meant about *L*, I meant. If she's not married, then I have no respect for her situation of shackin' up. If you're going to get defensive about that, that would honostly surprise me, seeing your views on things, but don't treat her as if she's been a friend of yours for as long as I have. I've known you for ten years, but if you start treating people better than you treat me, because they have horses they can ride, and a way to get them to shows, then I am afraid you are going to lose a friend here, because I will not tolerate that. I'm not saying this out of jealousy, but out of self-preservation. I've had that happen in the past and it hurts like crap when you get stepped over for new people who can do more for you. Friendship isn't about how much you can get out of someone, or what they can do for you. I really REALLY hope I'm wrong on this topic.
1. Listen to me when I talk. That means no interrupting, no talking around me, over me, or raising your voice as you PLOW ON through what you're saying when I try to take my turn in the conversation. That drives me nuts!
2. Believe it or not, *Gasp* I do know some stuff about stuff. Granted, you are a very very intelligent woman, and believe it or not, I -do- learn from you, but do NOT treat me as if my mind is an empty wasteland filled with useless information. I may not be the brightest bulb in the chandalier, but at least I can shine a little bit of light.
3. Which leads us to this. Please please do not talk to me as if I am a brain dead idiot in front of other horse people. I'm fat, which leads a -majority- of people in this society to come to the belief that fat people are stupid. That is not my opinion, it is fact. It is how I have been treated all of my life. I've seen it portrayed as such even on t.v., the fat one is stupid, the thin one is smart/tolerant/sometimes short tempered with said fat one. I don't need you enforcing such a -stupid- stereotype with me in front of strangers.
4. I know you do think I'm stupid, and for that, I'm sorry. I don't speak well, I mutter when I can't get the right words out and this bloody social problem of mine isn't going to get better, so therefore, I type out what I feel a heck of a lot better than I will ever speak them. I can't stutter and ramble and bumble my words in type.
5. Listen. To. Me. I appriciate that you've got your eyes open for a saddle for me. I appriciate that you're looking out for me, but why in the world did you think that I was interested in an English saddle? When you told me that you had found a saddle that was for sale, that was almost just like yours, I immediately assumed that you were talking about a western saddle, since I told you that I was interested in one. I find out on the phone with you today that it was an english, to which I quickly told you that I wasn't interested in. I already have a nice english saddle, and it's probably been ridden in less then ten times.
6. You're not my mother. I, again, appriciate that you watch out for me and look out for me, but when we get to the mother/daughter relationship, you're not going to like opening that door. You are my friend, and moreso, a sister in Christ.
7. Thank you for going to town with me when I need someone to go with. I appriciate that you will jump in the truck with me to go to the dump/town, and I have no problem whatsoever running errands for you too. It really makes me feel safe knowing that I have someone with me when I'm driving, and I am thankful that you don't mind going with me. That means more to me than you will even know, and I am glad that you can go with me.
8. It really hurt my feelings when you dumped me to go to the bowling green ranch show with traci, after I had brought it up to you not once, but twice, about us going. Then, you went on and on about the show, and about getting to ride your horse in there and whatnot, knowing that I wanted to go and couldn't. The suggestion of, "You should follow us!" should be addressed in point 7. I am not going to follow you up. What hurts is, you know that I like to go to ranch shows, yet you tell me, "I'd invite you to go with, but I'm not driving." Have you talked to traci and told her that I would love to go? You KNOW if the situation was reversed, I'd have you with us in a heartbeat. All you're thinking of is that you're getting your horse taken up to the show, and probably about how I would embarass you or something. It really hurts, and you've done this so many times, that I have shut the door on ranch shows. I will never go to one with you or traci, nor will I compete.
9. I just wonder if you talk bad about me like you tend to talk about traci. And what I meant about *L*, I meant. If she's not married, then I have no respect for her situation of shackin' up. If you're going to get defensive about that, that would honostly surprise me, seeing your views on things, but don't treat her as if she's been a friend of yours for as long as I have. I've known you for ten years, but if you start treating people better than you treat me, because they have horses they can ride, and a way to get them to shows, then I am afraid you are going to lose a friend here, because I will not tolerate that. I'm not saying this out of jealousy, but out of self-preservation. I've had that happen in the past and it hurts like crap when you get stepped over for new people who can do more for you. Friendship isn't about how much you can get out of someone, or what they can do for you. I really REALLY hope I'm wrong on this topic.
posted by Duske at 1:54 PM
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